The idea of spanking children has been a hot topic of debate for many years now.
I read a list today of reasons NOT to spank your child and one of the reasons offered was because your child doesn't learn good behavior versus not good behavior but rather they learn that spanking hurts and they learn to deceive and manipulate in order to not get caught again and therefore not get physically hurt.
What are your thoughts? Do you believe spanking is ok or not ok? Do you believe that spanking causes children to become manipulators?
I'm actually against spanking but I do believe in consequences and I do not believe that consequences causes children to become deceitful or manipulators.
Share your thoughts with me.
Audrey :)
skip to main |
skip to sidebar
Posts
3 comments:
I'm not a big fan of spankings, but sometimes with children who are between the ages of 1 and 3 it can be effective because they don't always understand reason but they can associate the spanking with a certain action. Such as, when my 1 1/2 year old repeatedly ran out in the street in front of our house I finally gave her a spanking. She didn't do it again. She associated running out in the street with the spanking. Nothing over-the-top, just a good swat. I'd much rather give her one spanking than have her get hit by a car. I think the behavior she learned was not to run out in the street.
Older children can be reasoned with, other consequences make far more sense. And babies should NEVER be spanked, ever. What would be the point of that?
I also think that if you find yourself spanking your kids all the time or spanking them when you are angry something is very very wrong.
Children should not grow up in a house, at any age, where they are afraid of being spanked all the time. I think if that is the case that the parent is out of control and that is not OK.
Every child is different. Little Miss is a born manipulator, and she isn't spanked. Mister Man would never dream of not being honest as the day is long, regardless of what you did to him (I assume). But consequences need to be meaningful to the child. The same thing doesn't work for everyone. Right now, Little Miss has special toys taken from her and put in timeout when she misbehaves because that's the best motivator for her.
As a mother of 6, I feel qualified to weigh in. I have spanked on occasion. And I cannot say that it ever really was that effective in changing behavior. More crafty "natural consequences" seem to get their attention more. Such as, if a kid fails/refuses to do homework, they can't go out and play or use any electronics/toys until it is done. Way more effective than spanking.
Post a Comment